Tiresome Toxicity
I keep telling myself that I’m fine and everything will be alright, but you know what? I am dead wrong. For months now, I’ve been rolling with the punches, and I am genuinely t-i-r-e-d.
I’m tired of…
- faking a smile
- acting like everything is fine
- my thoughts, my feelings
- doing what everyone expects of me
- being walked on
- going to bed every night alone
- feeling like I don’t belong
- living a lie
- taking the easy way out
- hurting the one’s I love
- fucking up everything
- not living up to my potential
- using alcohol as a crutch
I demolished a once exceptional life and poisoned all the love and happiness I once had…I need to change this before it is too late. I have already lost too many amazing people in my life due to my ways…myself being one of them. Now I’m just left with a few memories of the happiest times in my life.
My wish is to someday go back to being the person I once was…someone that held their head high with pride and ambition, and loved life for all that it had to offer. The good and the bad. Someone a Mother and Father actually cherished.
I don’t want to be tired, I want to get in the ring and fight.
